To contact me you can
a) shout REALLY loud
b) scour the UK for the most attractive, intelligent, modest young mother you have the blessed good fortunate to stumble across
c) email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
d) direct message me on twitter @my_funny_mummy
e) hire a light aircraft and sky write your request in the heavily polluted skies over the North West of England*
f) or to really make an impression, why not employ some sort of carrier pigeon thingy and go for the old school touch?*
*I’d defo go recorded delivery with these options.