|Right then cowboy...you call that level, do you?|
And...I could be mistaken...but...*sniffs* ...do we have a cat?
|What do you mean "don't shake it"? |
I'm not shaking it - see.
|If I keep my pyjamas on under my coat, does|
that mean they'll have to send me home?
What about if I forget how to drive?
|1) At the start line butter up the crowd.|
Waves and hand shakes from the athlete should whip them into a real frenzy.
|2) Select an alluring and, where possible, potentially messy target. |
A tempting reward will help you focus on the long task ahead.
|3) And we're off!|
Place both hands carefully down in front of you,
being absolutely sure they are ready to take your weight.
|4) With a smile for your adoring public, press up on to all fours,|
while always keeping your eye on the prize.
|A pasty faced, make up-less germfest.|
|Boo bouncing on my 80 year old Nan. |
Who has, as a result, been fast tracked for a new hip.
|(Complete with Dave's undies on the radiator)|
|(Complete with fresh hoover lines in the rug)|
|Oh shut up. It's not like it's 'Come Dine'.|
|My Funny Mummy: Always pushing the limits.|
This time of the term 'newsworthy'.
|Ladies who lunch. Jubilee-stylee.|