With our penchant for being startlingly greedy and our remarkable ability to jump without any good reason on the nearest slow moving band wagon, the Queen's Diamond Jubilee was a celebration that would not be passing myself, nor my equally unprincipled daughter by. Okay, we're not exactly Royalists. But neither are we Republicans. So, in the interests of fairness and equality, I don't see why fence sitting, unscrupulous, disreputable commoners such as our immoral selves should miss out on a right good knees up just because we don't buy into the whole idea of having values or beliefs.
Enter Betty's organised, creative, hard-working Godmother Sarah (the girl needs to be taught those qualities by someone), with suggestions of Jubilee afternoon tea in Manchester. The event would involve chatting and eating, with a little token flag waving in recognition of our sponsor. Can I eat and wave a flag at the same time? Yes? Then WE. ARE. IN.
*does a little dance in honour of scones*
|Ladies who lunch. Jubilee-stylee.|
Okay, and your question is this. Which lady is massively overdressed? No, no, not Sarah, on the right. She is actually half Filipino, so don't be fooled into believing she put that exotic look together especially.
No, no, not Jean, in the centre on the left. She may be the same age as the Queen, but didn't intentionally set out to upstage her fellow diners with a regal looking blouse and a pair of Bobby Dazzler earrings.
Keeping looking...ah! Yep. There you go. It's the Poop. Dressed in a hugely over the top puffball gown which is supported by layer upon layer of net, silk, chiffon and 'what a little princess' pretention.
But just wait.
In my defence, I have not suddenly been overcome with the desire to photograph my little girl sitting in a plant pot dressed as a flower, nor have I recently felt the urge to sit her peeping out of my handbag like a small designer dog (though this is mainly because it is Cath Kidston and she would definitely break the strap). She is not attired so preposterously because I wish for her to be assumed a WAG baby, or because it is Whit week and I have suddenly been stricken with pangs to pander to religious tradition.
She is wearing this absurdly showy garb because it was supposed to be her Christening dress, she didn't wear it, and I am getting my money out of the thing come Hell or high bloody water.