See You Later, Alligator

Don't tell me.
She played the sentimental card didn't she? Knew it.

Look, I'm going to be straight with you.
All the time she's been writing this blog, I've jumped in every so often and thrown in my two pennies worth on what in God's name she's up to now. And by-and-large, I've ripped the back out of her, because mostly, she's deserved it.

But look.

Her heart is in the right place. Both of them, Mum and Dad; they want the best for me. I get it.
But when I look back at the last year, having been primarily in my mother's care, I can hand on heart say - she doesn't have A CLUE.  She is A WORRY. And I am TOTALLY RELIEVED be moving on.

The timing of this is good. We're all ready for pastures new. And I really do, sincerely, wish them both, and more importantly, any other kids they have, the very best of luck with all of their future ventures. But the time has come...

*small office clerk woman runs on with slip of paper*

*Betty reads slip of paper*

You have GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.
I'M STAYING WITH THEM? CONTINUING TO BE CARED FOR BY THAT PAIR OF IDIOTS? 
FOREVER?! LIKE, LIFE? YOU'RE HAVING ME ON? TELL ME YOU'RE HAVING ME ON..?

*She checks again the details on the crumpled scrap of paper. Her shoulders drop. She looks up. Deflated. Dejected. Depressed. She takes a deep breath and sighs.*

Poo.