Horribly Nice

Right. What's going on?

Yesterday was our anniversary. And it was lovely. Relaxing. Fun. You know what? I'm going to say it.
It was *crosses fingers and bites lip*...perfect.

• We went to Chester and walked along the River Dee and around the city walls for ages - and I WORE SENSIBLE SHOES.
• We found a city centre car park which was really handy for a lovely clean baby change (rock n' roll) - and IT TURNED OUT TO BE THE CHEAPEST CAR PARK IN THE CITY BY A GOOD FEW QUID.
• We ate gorgeous sandwiches sat outside a fancy cafe, while a particularly excellent busker serenaded our meal - and IT DIDN'T RAIN.
• We bought each other gifts that we have both wanted for ages - and spent EXACTLY THE AMOUNT OF MONEY WE SAID WE WOULD.
• We left the city centre at 4: 45pm, readily rehearsing our most x-rated road rage expletives in anticipation of the bumper to bumper motorway traffic all the way home - and then SAILED DOWN THE MOTORWAY WITHOUT EVEN A SINGLE SOLITARY TRAFFIC LIGHT STANDING IN OUR WAY.
• After an exciting day, we arrived home, fully aware that having slept all the way back, The Poop would now make bedtime a long, drawn out, thanklessly tedious task - only for her to GO TO BED WITHOUT A MURMUR OF RESISTANCE OR WHINGING; WITHOUT EVEN A STORY.

Nah. I don't like it. I'm sorry. It's just too weird.

Whatever happened to the dog that was scheduled to urinate up the side of the pram as we ate? How come one of my bra wires didn't work loose and subsequently focus all its attention on attempting to saw my whole body in half as I ambled around the shops? I wasn't even offered ONE TINY OPPORTUNITY TO WASTE THREE OR FOUR MINUTES COMPLETING MARKET RESEARCH/A SLIP, TRIP OR FALL CLAIM/BEING INTERVIEW ABOUT MY CAVITY WALL INSULATION NEEDS.

Not only is the whole thing thoroughly unnerving, it's absolutely pathetic.

I've got a blog to write for heaven's sake, and frankly, this kind of carry on is utterly useless to me.

Some people really just don't think on.